Since last night, I am finding that I am arriving into a dwelling place, like a hidden cave, deep in my psyche and heart, that was awaiting my return. In this cave, there is an ancient ember, and a beckoning. . . a voice, that says, "Commit, devote. . . to me".
I answer. I allow my aloneness.
Self-love shows up as withdrawal and sobriety from years of codependent habituations of losing myself in a man outside of me, in a lover and relationship.
Self-love shows up as quiet nights alone, in bed early, praying to Kali Ma and my team of guides to direct me into deeper service and lead me on my path. It shows up in my meditation on where to move next, knowing my time is coming up here in this city, yet not knowing where I'll head next.
It shows up in trust and surrender, to this inner voice. Patience and slowing down, embracing the brazen inner child in me who yells for answers, yes, just embracing her in every moment.
Self-love shows up as I keep my phone off, all morning, until noon, so that i may drop miles deeply into my being, trusting that I am loved by a wealth of family and friends, without needing to rely on my text-facebook-email-instagram...etc. to reinforce a sense of connection.
Self-love shows up as I write this blog, and step into honoring my voice, my expressions in the world as valid and valable - as more than worthy of being heard.
It shows up as I validate my online coaching business ; with that - my prayer for the empowerment of women ...and all genders and non-binary beings, to step greater into the liberation that arises from experiencing the Inner Union of the Divine Masculine and Feminine.
Self-love shows up as I feel the oceans of love that my heart continues to reveal to me, for this collective reality we are all sharing. I am so totally in love and awe with the very miracle of life, the erotic pulse of the cosmos and Source, that I have no other directive now than to devote my life - - to this. To the re-Pairing of the collective consciousness, that is suffering from separation, all around the globe. Which is also awakening unto itSelf, all over the globe. Invoking the desire to walk as the Sacred Feminine, I choose to hold our world ,my clients, my community, in that kind of love: mothering, sisterly, and of the divine consort.
Finally, self-love is a choice. Each moment, we have the power to choose. And, once we awaken to the reality of the power to choose, life will take on a whole other level; it is a whole new game!